Thursday, December 18, 2008

A casting from the Crucible of the Refiner's fire (Audio)

Can someone have real affairs on line?
Can we have cyber-orgasms?

This bit of writing was inspired by the first thing I read this morning, “ARTHUR BLACK: Calling all computer geeks: it’s time to get real,”. At the same time I'm reading, Jian Ghomeshi, is interviewing people on the topic of the great comics of the last era, George Carlin, Albert Brooks, Richard Prior among them and how the all parodied their audiences and helped affect real change by giving people perspective via introspection. This, of course, carried me back to the DMT experience I had for the first time last night. I wonder if this feeling of a super mentally “lubricated feeling,” as if my thoughts are on a frictionless film, racing by, jumping from one fleeting entanglement to another, is a residual effect? I rather like it, but they seem a bit elusive, hard to coral at first. I have a feeling that writing them down will be achievable. You be the judge!

Back to the top of the stack, for refreshed operational potential, like I imagined the next Noseeum taking up its position, providing a continuous tactical coverage by the invisible defensive net. Another thought slips by.

Next comes a 15 minute language laden encounter with the Odd Barnacle as he walks by my “cage,” off for a walk in the deep snow. The traffic is light below on Great Northern way. The Barnacle is a well read guy and like most of my friends, likes to use words effectively. It's real fun!!

The gist off it was this piece of writing, the fluid residual effects, what he's read by the researchers on the subject of DMT, and how it all might fit in. Even unto the ramblings in this article did the conversation travel. We touched on why I was led to my present course this late in life. We both wondered as to why I wished to be refined in this crucible, or at least my impression of it.

I truly feel that I am being led by the spirit. He is in general agreement, but voiced the question about how to make the wider world aware of the solutions to our misery. Our culture treats me with ridicule, while other cultures would cherish people such as I with traditional respect. Barnacle, voiced the rhetorical question about how to get something like this to fly and hopefully fertilize the whole of humanity with the seeds for fresh perspectives.

We touched briefly on how one might ignite such a movement. That's when I stated that one needn't really have a plan if you are following the spirit within, in fact it is best to leave all personal control fencing out of it, and let the wild mustangs gallop where they will. The spirit must have a plan if one is necessary, I don't need one. All I need to do is to go where I am urged to wander, to stampede.

Our conversation touched on my oversensitivity, upon which he remarked a few days ago, as I was recounting a family story gleaned from my father's war adventures (he had asked me what division my father fought with in Stalingrad). I break out into minor, but real emotional distress and can go to tearing up when recounting a story, easily. The next verbal paragraph, I might range to the tones of an aggressive threat, a dangerous man with violence in the deep undertones. I have learned through experienced to unconsciously put my emotions into my voice, sometimes to my great detriment. Yet I love it! I count myself a full range Primate in many aspects of my personality and character. Some people may judge this less than normal in a derogatory sense, perhaps a mental imbalance of some sort. I say that they are the ones missing the special colored marbles that I was fortunate to have been born with, perhaps even have enhanced a bit.

Anyways, I can be in the passenger compartment of the Swiss Air flight over Peggy's cove, the moment I hear the first live radio message. Immediately, as now, I taste the plastics laden smoke and fear, I hear screams/wailing/moaning, feel hands clutching loved ones. I was there in one micro second with the full emotional impact rippling through all my senses. You may not like it. I love the full bipolar extremity of this range, thoroughly, deeply. I believe it is what drives me to write. Other writers must have this gift as well. How could you not have it and presume to write scenes where such a spectrum of emotions is required?

We broke off, and he went about his business after he gave me a beautiful Xmass card, which has also now touched me into tearing up a bit. Here is the conclusion I came to in our conversation: I am doing all these things, being honestly led there by my spirit. I have no plan. People, and new avenues present themselves to me in my time of need, as they are required. It is not important that I understand the process as if they fit into some kind of over arching plot. That's the human in us that wants to control everything in a finite sense, isn't it? This summation flowed from me spontaneously, “All I am, is a casting being poured from the crucible of the Refiner's fire.”

Back to the top of the stack for real this time.

Here is the beautiful bow that I will attempt to tie Arthur Black's article up with. For sure I believe that one can have real sex on a computer with, or without, an avatar. All the sensory mechanisms and responses are there. The cyber conversation flows in a reciprocating form; one posts, the other answers. There is the physical touching and “caressing” of the keyboard, which in my case ranges widely from pounding in aggressive assertion, through a gentle furtive pecking. There is the audio and visual of course, if you have it. I don't have a live interface in my face though, and feel I don't need it (although I've only ever attempted cyber flirting and never tried to go all the way before). But the very best, and most sensual human interaction during live sex can be accessed fully, I believe via the keyboard, too! I think a woman's, and a man's sexiest attribute which they might bring to a tryst, would be their imaginations. On this medium there is no limit to the orgasms attainable via my imagination, I am sure! It now seems something that I might wish to try, (for exploratory and research purposes only, of course.)

To everyone who might choose these venues, be happy and explore, while remaining spiritually true.

And here is my first vulgar gift, al la George Carlin: Hey guys happy “keybroading”!!!!!!!!!!

Just who is God? Bud's Quest as an Oracle (Audio)

An Oracle's quest is never ending. I was born that way. When the question "why" quits forming in my mind, I will likely be dead. There is nothing that I will take on the face of it for long.

This morning I heard the tail end of an interview with a U of Calgary Prof, Biologist Stuart Kauffman. He tells us about his quest to re-imagine God and re-invent the sacred. It sounded right up my ally and so I remembered to download it tonight.

I was on this track again when blogging during the day, as always.

The following is an email I sent to the current. It says it all.

I loved the podcast today on Reinventing god.

For me the part of the natural processes which are of this bio entity
that I believe makes us a part of this "god entity," also gives us the mechanisms that can complete our understanding of it. The natural ethnogens can be, and have been in the past, the form of spiritual enlightenment of itself. Where else, but from these altered states did our imaginations come up with some of these vast concepts?

It's aprobo that Gian G is presently talking to this actor who claims that "drugs were a big problem." To label all substances, which are unfamiliar to us presently with the addictive dangerous sign, is unfair. As I said in a post on today, A certain proportion of humans have the propensity to become addicted to many different substances, both legal and recommend, to illegal and discouraged.

        fred wrote:
        hey bud, i see you brought some freinds from across the border.
        maybe they know who rougee dusette]misspell] was. listen people
        dont die from weed, people die from people, and stupidity. jdub
        you may be rght about the worst drugs being prescription drugs,
        very dangerous, alot of abuse and addictiveness that comes w/
        them.look at narcotics for pain. i once had a pres. for
        methadone, for 6 mnths. i have a bad back. the meds were a blast
        to be on,but took me 6 wks to dry out and they almost killed me.
        so what are the real demons? pot or scrips you tell me?
That's a good question: What are the real demons?

I firmly believe/know that the demons are within each of us ready to go out of control in many different ways given the slightest chance.

I believe by allowing the government to try to mitigate the harm of each individual person from their very specific problems, is folly.

First of all, it gives each wimpy personal demon, which we all have, the capacity within us to conquer a huge national, even international presence and the power that goes with it. the individual demons form criminal organizations.

All these free choices with their attendant demons, as well as victories, can make each of us more self reliant and confident to tackle more challenging monsters in the future, should they crop up.

In effect, by denying each our personal growth through freedom of choice, the government makes a mount Everest out of a mo hill.

Thereby causing much more addiction through the aggressive marketing of truly dangerous drugs by criminal entrepreneurs, filthy rich and totally careless over any ones health.

Recent studies on addiction show that there will always be a certain percentage of the population that succumbs to addiction, the substance truly doesn't matter.

Please listen to my scientific argument on which my successful claim of right has been stablished.

I have sent this personal reasoned argument "Institutionalized Idiocy" in to all the ministries of both levels of government more than six months ago and I continue to openly sell prohibited substances without interference, so it must be valid. I have been complimented by academics of UBC and SFU on it:"

What do I seek in my drug use? I seek adventure, revelation, understanding, in Psychedelics and a pleasant state of being when smoking marijuana, none of which anyone has the right to deny me, or even judge me for. The irrational fears and judgment go to your own loss and denigration. No one can see clearly with the blinders of conformity on, even a little bit. If you don't want this experience, don't do it, that's your choice. You better leave me to mine, or we are going to have a problem.

I'm quite rational when I tried DMT for the first time after listening to your podcast, tonight. I had heard that it was more intense than LSD, that real hallucinations of fantastic visions of creatures giving you the secrets of the universe, but speaking in colors and visual patterns were possible. As an Oracle, I wanted revelations on the subject so I gave it a whirl.

To begin with, I do have a concern for not hurting myself, so I researched it thoroughly and had a small bit of anxiety when I embarked on my quest, seeking the unknown. I wore a glove on the hand holding the pipe in case I lost awareness and passed out so as not to burn myself, settled into a comfy chair and exhaled all the air in my lungs for a long uninterrupted inhalation.

When the deep inhalations of the vapor began their effects, I continued to be aware enough on one level to wait for a minute to put the hot pipe down carefully and let the drug's effects wash over, through me. Certainly a very powerful hallucinogen which leaves your conscious awareness intact.

Did I see god? No.

Rather, I was looking from his mind through his mind's eye, and seeing with his eyes while understanding with his soul.

For sure I am god. There is no doubt.

What's the significance of it?

That is a variable which depends totally on the individual, isn't it?

Here is a video which I found Jan 9 2009 which reminds me of this experience.

I've also tried another DMT session since the first one and recorded it on Jan 12

There is no moral reason that these tools shouldn't be used by those called to use them. People of reason must see that this is a more valid mechanism to gain enlightenment, than the Roman Catholic Church or any organized religious fraud, because it is so personal and very natural.

I'm sure the propaganda against these experiences as "dangerous drug use," was originally so that no new perceptions of reality, spirituality, might threaten/challenge those already established religious cons. The non denigrated, perhaps promoted as safe mystical experiences of these altered states, would foster a new attitude. Open searching with these substances would lead to an individual spiritual Renascence, which could bring much needed rejuvenation to our societies. I see it as a safe antidote to the dangerous, addictive, fraudulent, enslaving drug of consumerism, marketed constantly from every venue, while at the same time destroying our biosphere. We are suffering the effect's spiritual stagnation throughout the entire world. People are craving this natural enlightenment, but their needs are not being met by the current religions, rather they are being further corrupted into sometimes violent political fraud, and oppression of all stripes.

I believe that without this enlightenment, rejuvenation, we as a species may not survive.

I started to write this when the effects had almost worn off. Psychedelics have never impaired me in any way, rather enhanced my perception/awareness in a myriad of ways.

I had a very entertaining conversation with an intelligent friend starting about halfway through the 15 minute experience, when he knocked on my door. He wrote the podcast "The Origins of Conservatives and liberals," Odd Barnacle. It means a lot to me to have such a depth of intelligent people who are in my life. Although I am always broke, I am a very happy, rich feeling person.

Have a great day. I love your programs they are rarely boring!

Bud the Oracle.

PS. I have served my Claim of Right.