Freedom of Choice means the right to choose whatever diet one wishes. It is the mechanism of Natural selection which accomplishes variety in mutations. It is a NECESSARY part of the human condition since life began as is FARTING.
Here is a scenario which is comparable to the government wishing to control our diets for conformity.
BAD ODOR BYLAWS
For your enlightened consideration
The Rude Odor Eradication Act is sponsored by the fair fragrance franchise marketing control board
Be it resolved that the passing of noxious bowel odor gases is anti social behavior when it takes place in a confined area, such as elevators, small meeting rooms, and other poorly ventilated locations.
The passing of gas, or “farting” in the colloquial has been deemed an transgressor act exposing others to internal hazardous vapors and second hand fart inhalation. There is a likelihood of pathogen transfer if high density vapors are released from a contagious orifice.
The other, equally valid consideration, is the injury to the spirit of those who are odor conscious and make an effort to smell nice. The nasally correct who have achieved a professionally created, socially approved scented balance must have recourse to those inconsiderate odiferous disease spreading criminals.
Everyone has the right to breath clean correctly scented air!
Undercover plain cloths detection and enforcement teams for bowel gas bylaw violations can be lightly armed and need not be armored. They can operate in pairs per building random riding elevators and patrolling halls and confined spaces.
Each member will be trained in the handling of bowl gas source detection ferrets which can be carried unobtrusively concealed in special clothing compartments, purses or satchels. These ferrets will be trained to locate the source of any bad bowel odor. Each ferret and handler will be verified and certified via regular retesting to be able to accomplish this feat of source location accurately.
Every odor enforcement officer will be required to carry an air sampling device which will capture the offensive aroma and match that in an analytical laboratory against an anal swab to be performed immediately upon arrest. Each sample must be properly labeled under the rules of evidence to comply with court procedural rules. The arresting officer will have the authority to deploy TASER weapons on the offender should they fail to bend over upon request for sampling.
Each proven offense must be accompanied by a $250.00 fine. A repeat malodorous offender may be incarcerated for up to, but no longer than, 6 months.
A medical certificate will be required at the time of the arrest if health grounds are to be used as a lawful excuse. Only illnesses of the bowels will be considered a legal excuse.
The Minister of Public safety has just started to reject my auto update notifications from this blog> I wonder if you could help keep Peter van Loan abreast of my new blog posts by sending him the update links every new post or Utube video. I am sure he will appreciate that:
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Date: Sun, 27 Dec 2009 11:03:43 -0800
From: bud oracle
Subject: [Sunshine Soup] Prohibition is the cause of crime
What the fack do people think I am talking about? These are the facts of the results of drug war.